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(c) 1998 by Lewis D'Aubin and Kirk Madison PREV TRACK 
NEXT TRACK Dogs & cats Living together Rabbits & raccoons Birds of a feather Incestuous beasts Fornicatin' freaks Sinning with their hooves and their horns and their beaks Well it's morally wrong it's morally wrong well it's traditionally wrong unconditionally wrong it's morally wrong morally wrong philosophically, ethically morally wrong Betting on a horse that you know is gonna win Eating chocolate cake when you're trying to stay thin Shootin' the bird at the holy pope Smokin' that wacko loco dope Well it's morally wrong it's morally wrong well it's decidedly wrong unabidedly wrong it's morally wrong morally wrong philosophically, ethically morally wrong Takin' more than 10 items through the express line Returning that tape that you didn't rewind Stealin parkin' spaces from the handicapped Makin' nice warm mittens from your neighbor's cat Well it's morally wrong it's morally wrong it's abnormally wrong paranormally wrong it's morally wrong morally wrong philosophically, ethically morally wrong Puh-layin' the guitar in a rock & roll band Greeting a friend with an outstretched left hand These things offend God - they're intrinsically wrong I commited a sin just by writing this song Well it's morally wrong it's morally wrong it's metaphorically wrong categorically wrong it's morally wrong morally wrong philosophically, ethically morally wrong Well it's morally wrong it's morally wrong well it's traditionally wrong unconditionally wrong it's morally wrong morally wrong philosophically, ethically morally wrong |
 This perennial favorite started out on quite a different topic; originally it was called 'Used Starship For Sale'. The 12-bar boogie woogie 'Elvis' rhythm and progression were retained, and I started writing down a list of the most banal sins I could think of. When I sat down to make the demo recording, the song was a wee bit too long (and it's still abnormally long!) so I cut out a verse about purposefully sneezing on a restaurant salad bar, and lo and behold, there it was! All finished! Well, not quite. The chorus still wasn't quite there, until Charlie Tumminello suggested the triplet "philosophically, ethically, morally"... There was also the matter of the recording, and for this song I had a LOT of guest stars in mind. Starting with piano. Sadly, I didn't have access to a real piano, so I upgraded my piano sample and brought in Robert Fontenot, whose band 'Six Demon Bag' was actually renting the studio as a practice space for a few nights each week. Robert locked himself in my control room for a couple hours while I worked on repairing speakers cords in the front, and pounded out a rhythm part and a great piano solo on my Ensoniq keyboard. The demo was starting to sound like a song! There was no way the C.O.G. would release something so straightforward, so I began constructing the middle section of the song to do something I had always wanted to do - parody the wild middle section of Led Zeppelin's 'Whole Lotta Love'. I figured we could slip in parodies of several other recognizable drum licks as well. With all this in mind, I called up the best drummer I knew, the reliable Roddy Ory. Roddy came in with his Simmons drum pads and Alesis D4 drum brain, and real cymbals. I miked the cymbals with my old PZM's and midi'd the drum brain to the C.O.G. computer, so he would be directly driving Drumbot's samples. We spent a few hours piecing together the various drum parts in the middle, which were just open measures in my demo. Roddy played parts of 'Frankenstein' and Neil Peart's 'Rhythm Method' (in real time, I might add!) and then laid on the hi-hat counting for the 'Whole Lotta Love' part in the middle. A great and energetic performance! Only thing missing was the 'In A Gadda Da Vida' drum quote I had originally wanted - sadly, there was no place to put that, so it was cut. Next step was the bass. I called the best bassist I knew, the reliable Owen Pascual, who obtained an actual upright string bass! Wow. I'd never recorded one of these before! We set the bass up in the center of the room and miked it with an EV condenser. Owen had never played one of these things before on a recording, and nailed it on the second take. Amazing! Step three was guitar. I called my friend Steve Paul Alexander, one of the most imaginative guitarists I knew. When he was in the band 'Sole Relyer' with the aforementioned Roddy and Owen, he could play like Steve Morse. Since the breakup of that band however he had been playing bass in a French Quarter cover band and his chops had deteriorated a little. But when you're recording, you can mess up as much as you want; only the final take matters! So Steve came in with an Ibanez guitar and a little combo Crate amp which we spent some time miking up. Steve came up with a fantastic rockabilly rhythm part, which we quickly recorded, and then set about writing a guitar solo parodying several well known guitar solos, encompassing Chuck Berry, Jimmy Page, Billy Gibbons, and Steve Morse. This proved VERY difficult to record in one take, but Steve insisted and after a bunch of attempts and a shot of whiskey, we got the winning take. The piece de resistance proved to be the horns. After asking around unsuccessfully for sax players who wanted to contribute, I finally contacted the band Egg Yolk Jubilee and hung out at their practice. Paul Grass and Glenn Barbarot dropped by the C.O.G. Secret Lab on Saturday afternoon, and I brought the beer. We spent the evening laying down all kinds of tenor and bass sax tracks until they were too inebriated to play! "Which track are you going to use for the solo?" they asked on the way out. "All of them!" I answered! This was accomplished through a little cheating; I autotuned the solos to nail down the blue notes, and starting with one solo track playing, I ramped up the others behind it till all 9 solo tracks were playing at the same time. A fantastic and confusing melange of sound! Final work consisted of laying on good vocals and sound effects, and of course mixing. For the middle section, I didn't have a theremin handy like Led Zeppelin did, but I did have a bunch of gasoline engines in the form of my car, my lawnmower, my weedwacker... all these were recorded and combined in the middle of the song. If you listen carefully you'll hear them get higher and higher pitched. The final addition was the 'bop bop' chorus at the end, a ripoff of Cheap Trick's cover of 'Don't Be Cruel'. I sang the final note to resolve it to a minor key, an interesting ending that has never been attempted live. Credits Drums...........Roddy Ory Guitars.........Steve Alexander Bass............Owen Pascual Piano...........Rob Fontenot Saxaphone.......Paul Grass Tuba............Glenn Barbarot Lead vocal......Lewis D'Aubin Backing vocals..Lewis D'Aubin, Chris Flattmann Recorded and mixed 1998 at C.O.G. Secret Lab, Kenner LA |